Questions on life
People are so lonely. And so scared. Scared to live and scared to die.
It is an indisputable truth that the fear of dying will deprive you of living. And what should you do? Its not just that you re afraid to die.......when you re young thats not so bad.
The worst is to know that the people you love, the ones that make up your world, your reality will die.
So you hold on sometimes even to people you don't really want to hold on to from some strange sense of duty or fear or don't know what else.
And you loose.
Sometimes the guilt of leaving someone that seems to need you so so much is enough to keep you with this person and in effect loose something or someone else.
Who or what are you willing to give up for security? And is it worth spending your life in loneliness as a result?
I dunno......I certainly have not been able to compromise with this idea. The point is.....am I asking too much from people?
Perhaps. Most certainly this is a possibility I must entertain.
But I ask so much because I give back so much more. I'm listening to this song now and it says:
"Don't let go, you got the music in you, one dance left, this one will have to pull through, don't let go, you got the music in you, can't forget we only get what we get"
Loneliness is worse when from a brief moment you experience the opposite. True or not , it matters not. The fact is that if your soul stops feeling this immense feeling of loneliness and then this comes back....well then you re shattered.
I have found that keeping busy certainly helps. Work has always been a good antidote, probably cause I love it so much.
But lately I seem to be unable to find this kind of relief. It is certainly difficult. I wonder if I will look back at these times and say to myself what a fool I have been.
Perhaps.
So many questions and dilemmas. I see other people, people who behave with much less compassion and understanding and are much better off. It seems that the the more you understand the less you get back. Or maybe I'm just bitter now:P
I have always been the one to say I need noone. I enjoy the company of friends but need.....this is a word I choose not to use. I have certainly lost too many to allow myself to need again.
I cannot stand being so vulnerable. But the fact is .......you cannot always keep it under control.
What should I do?
It is an indisputable truth that the fear of dying will deprive you of living. And what should you do? Its not just that you re afraid to die.......when you re young thats not so bad.
The worst is to know that the people you love, the ones that make up your world, your reality will die.
So you hold on sometimes even to people you don't really want to hold on to from some strange sense of duty or fear or don't know what else.
And you loose.
Sometimes the guilt of leaving someone that seems to need you so so much is enough to keep you with this person and in effect loose something or someone else.
Who or what are you willing to give up for security? And is it worth spending your life in loneliness as a result?
I dunno......I certainly have not been able to compromise with this idea. The point is.....am I asking too much from people?
Perhaps. Most certainly this is a possibility I must entertain.
But I ask so much because I give back so much more. I'm listening to this song now and it says:
"Don't let go, you got the music in you, one dance left, this one will have to pull through, don't let go, you got the music in you, can't forget we only get what we get"
Loneliness is worse when from a brief moment you experience the opposite. True or not , it matters not. The fact is that if your soul stops feeling this immense feeling of loneliness and then this comes back....well then you re shattered.
I have found that keeping busy certainly helps. Work has always been a good antidote, probably cause I love it so much.
But lately I seem to be unable to find this kind of relief. It is certainly difficult. I wonder if I will look back at these times and say to myself what a fool I have been.
Perhaps.
So many questions and dilemmas. I see other people, people who behave with much less compassion and understanding and are much better off. It seems that the the more you understand the less you get back. Or maybe I'm just bitter now:P
I have always been the one to say I need noone. I enjoy the company of friends but need.....this is a word I choose not to use. I have certainly lost too many to allow myself to need again.
I cannot stand being so vulnerable. But the fact is .......you cannot always keep it under control.
What should I do?
Labels: Personal, Philosophy, Saddenes
posted by Tatiana | 5:54 pm
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