Gabrielle said in yesterday's episode of Desperate Housewives 'Don't hijack a Ferrari if you don't know how to drive'

Remember that because most people can't drive a Ferrari....and when they look at it they see the money it represents not its passion or its quality.

Very few people can drive a Ferrari.

I am angry tonight. At several things and that anger is taking over every bit of me.....so angry....

Strange how the psyche reacts......and I am listening to Enigma, who always calm me down..

Yeah right.....not tonight.

Anger I guess is a healthy way of feeling now.

Better than sad........strangest thing I am not angry at something in particular I am angry in general, with images flashing pass my eyes, with feelings, with broken words....

Earlier I almost through my cell against the wall to smash it....don't thankfully I love this phone (Samsung E900) but I felt like doing it....

If I didn't have to go to work tomorrow I would just take my car and drive all night......because I'm so angry I cannot ever breathe.....

Tired of endless trains of the faithless of cities filled with the foolish. I wonder or maybe I await for someone who does see the way I do....people are infatuated by the way I see and claim to be in synch....claim to be that person........right.....it takes courage not words.....it takes a whole life of sticking by these beliefs....pathetic excuses of people stuck in meaningless lives.....I'm tired.....

Tired of people trying to find meaning in useless relationships, in meaningless sex, in empty lives, in blank thoughts..........

Life is a mystery to be lived, a spiritual journey to be explored where are you loosing your time people???? Wake up it doesn't last forever......

Sizitisi sto Gmail :P

(sizitisi.......)
................................................................................................................
kosnaa: telika ti eskase xtes?

me: diafora skane den einai mono ena:S
to ena parasirei kai to allo

kosnaa: yparxei to antidomino design pattern kai tyxainei na einai kai to pio aplo ap ola

me: dld???

kosnaa: leei oti an ola paraseronte apo alla systhmata tote 8a prepei na kleiseis ton geniko , na dhlwseis paraithsh , na pas spiti sou , na paketareis ta pragmata sou kai na pas na gineis agrotisa
einai h pio amesh lysh kai mental friendly

me: LOLOLOL
agrotisa me goves stileto?
xlwmo

kosnaa: metrosexual agrotisa

me: den eimai metrosexual:P oi antres einai

kosnaa: an hsoun antras omws 8a hsoun

me: lololol pithanos

kosnaa: kai 8a eixes sthn stanh egatesthmeno to Gidux

me: poio?

kosnaa: Gidux (ellhnisti: Γίδουξ)
einai clonos toy linux eidika prosarmosmeno gia apaithtikous agrotes
me proegatestimeno GidiFS

me: LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
skase pethaino edo pera:P

kosnaa: kala

me: oxi mi skas sinexise

kosna:8a valoun sto epomeno armegma proegatesthmeno rdbms to G.Q.L. (Goat Query Language) to opoio 8a meiwnei tis apaithseis se velasmata prokeimenou na kaneis to erwthma

Exei exeligmeno network layer pou 8a metaferei ta TCP packets se avgo8hkes

..................................................................................................................................................................
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dead poets society

John Keating: Close your eyes - closure! Close 'em! Now, describe what you see.
Todd Anderson: I... I close my eyes, and this image floats beside me.
John Keating: A sweaty-toothed madman.
Todd Anderson: A sweaty-toothed madman with a stare that pounds my brain.
John Keating: Oh, that's *excellent*! Now, give him action - make him do something!
Todd Anderson: His hands reach out and choke me.
John Keating: That's it! Wonderful, wonderful!
Todd Anderson: And all the time he's mumbling.
John Keating: What's he mumbling?
Todd Anderson: Mumbling truth... Truth's like a blanket that always leaves your feet cold.
John Keating: [some of the class start to laugh] Forget them, forget them! Stay with the blanket. Tell me about that blanket!
Todd Anderson: Y-You push it, stretch it, it'll never be enough. You kick at it, beat it, it will never cover any of us. From the moment we enter crying to the moment we leave dying, it will cover just your head as you wail and cry and scream!
[class appauds]
John Keating: Don't you forget this.


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[Quoting Henry David Thoreau]
Neil: I went into the woods because I wanted to live deliberately. I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life... to put to rout all that was not life; and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.


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The time comes you have to pay for your unconquerable soul. You pay the price and you pay not gladly but willingly.

Because you know as Todd says that form the moment you come crying in this world you will search for truth, the truth.

So let there be light as Multivac says in the Last Question. Dedication to knowledge and truth and spirituality demands a quality you are born with I come to conclude.

You are born a dreamer you do not become one.

Forget those who boast about their 'intelligence', their 'quality', their 'dreams'.

Dreams are sufficient in themselves. Dreams are not about wealth, not about sex, not about jobs. Dreams are about the eternal universal truths, about the never ending galaxies, about uncounted cosmic particles traveling from the Big Bang to the ends of the universe. About Magellan's clouds and poetry by Walt Whitman and Da Vinci's paintings.

Dreams are about never ending journeys, new and better songs, stars always bright in night skies, hot chocolate (irrelevant), smiles, birth, love, strangers you meet in far away lands that you love, warm blankets in soft mattresses, pillow fights, dances, clear blue seas, golden summers, kids smiling under the sun in some Aegean island, fireworks, presents under the Xmas tree, the Galaxy in the night sky, a pair of eyes you love, knowledge, dolphins, blue, and Love.

As Walt Whitman says (again) when I give I give myself. An act of courage or a fool's act? I say truth is the only path to follow. The only virtue.

“I celebrate myself, and sing myself, And what I assume you shall assume, For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you”

Rejoice for you are here, now, alive and there is still time for your verse.

Carpe diem....Most men live lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them. Do you weep to this verse?

Barbaric YAWP!

I too am not a bit tamed, I too am untranslatable, I sound my barbaric YAWP over the roofs of the world.

Walt Whitman Leaves of Grass

Numb.....that's how I can describe myself now.

So strange...numb with sudden bursts of ache usually caused by images.

This is not a welcome numbness. It is not comforting nor soothing.

It is as if you take a step back and watch life from a glass window.......and you wait. I know this is a phase, one that one has to go through in order to recover. And it is also much more welcome than the nervous tension that precedes it.

But I do miss excitement. And spontaneous laughter. I miss waking up smiling or at least light.....at heart.

They say friends help you through. Very true as long as they are true friends and have the time and the willingness.

What helps me? Oh the usual (for me).....movies (I saw again 'Someone like you' with Hugh Jackman....my favorite, Love Actually, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade etc....), series (I saw yesterday at long last the first 2 episodes of season 6 of 24.....Jack Bauer rulezzzzzzz), music (Enigma A posteriori - I keep listening to Goodbye Milky Way), sleep (I guess I've been deprived for too long), books, art (I'm digging into the complete works of Leonardo and a study on Fairy art) and loneliness.

I feel empty and cold. There are moments that I'm better but mostly I'm just trying to refill a bottomless pit. Or maybe a fountain that was always full and ready to give but now......well I never thought it would happen but it has run out.

But then when I consider all this I get angry. Really angry and I say ...no I promise that I will not let the fire go out, spark by truly irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless and vain attempts of the not-quite, not-yet, not-at-all.

Life.....it does take courage. And the will to carry on even when things are so rough that you just want to curl up and cry. Well.....cry you must sometimes but then you wipe your eyes , you put on your makeup (yeah I'm a woman so what?), and you get ready to face the rest of your life.

With dignity, and respect, and strength and passion. So difficult when you have doors slammed at your face.

There is a certain connection that one has with his soul. Like a connection or a feeling, I cannot really describe it but I feel it, the true essence of who you are. You know it and you feel it, usually at your very best but even in the quiet hours of the night, or in crisis when you ache and you cry out and this connection with yourself keeps you and holds you and gives you strength.

I lost that......by trying to hard for something else. I didn't understand it while it was happening but I am now trying to re-establish it. Its not easy.

I just talked to Nikos P. I have never met a manager like him. I truly and honestly admire and like him.

Well...back to work. Always a good way of passing the time......

People always leave......

Venice Carnival 2007

Carnival of Venice

After.....

So...did I say I love Xmas?

Remind me never to say that I love anything.....bound to go wrong:S

Anyway this Xmas season was by far one of the worst....I can't write about it I don't want to remember it or reflect upon it, try to understand it or whatever. 2006 is over and with it a big part of ...I dunno what to call it.

Maybe in the future I will be able to write about it, reason with this Xmas, understand it and get over it. But at the moment silence is best practice.

Does everything that hurts you make you stronger? Perhaps but it also weakens your hope...and I'm tired of bleeding hope. I'm tired of picking up my pieces again and again and again. For anyone.

I don't exactly know what to write....thats a first for me:) But since this blog is something I will look to in the future I need to write something, anything.

So I'm hoping to go to the Venice Carnival this year, its my dream (well one of them anyway) and I need a dream right about now.

The truth is......as Occam's Razor principle states.....when you have two or more competing theories that make exactly the same predictions (meaning) the simplest tends to be the truth.

And the simplest is that it just wasn't worth it I am sorry to say.

Always trust relativity.

The guys.....